The past month of my life has been a whirlwind. It went from packing up, saying goodbye to friends, hosting a mission team, flying here, settling into the house in less than 24 hours, packing up again and going to stay out with John's family in a timeshare on Disney property, 2 days with them out there, coming home and unpacking and then driving an hour each way for three more days to be with John's family in Deland while his sisters and mom were here. By the time we pulled out on Friday night from her house, at 10 p.m., I literally cried ALL the way home and had a huge meltdown. I guess I had been bottling everything inside of me and just putting on a "I'm fine, everything is great. I'm so happy to be back in the states," face. I was also beyond exhausted. Seriously, it was inconceivable how tired I was and still am from the enormous amount of activity and huge life changes we have just experienced.
It might seem like I have a lot of energy and go, go, go, but the truth is that I need about 10 hours of sleep a night, cannot have too much activity every day and need lots of "margin" in my life. The need for margin became so apparent as we were just hustling from one thing to the next. And don't even get me started on my kid's behavior through all of this. Actually, their behavior is fine, it's just that they have lost their manners and some of the fundamentals we have taught them. But they are transitioning as well, so I have a lot of grace for them.
Here are some things I would like to post about in the next few days:
My new itty-bitty, tiny nose-ring. (No negative opinions please. It's already done and I have no conviction about it).
God's awesome provisions!!!!
The sadness I have felt being here in the States and how transitioning to a new place is hard, no matter where it is.
Looking like a complete moron in public because I don't know how things are done here anymore.
My thoughts about my first term.
Running Club!
Materialism and how I am responding different than I thought I would.
Well, it's late and I want to read a cookbook my aunt is letting me borrow - 1,400 Best Slow Cook Recipes. Yummy!
4 comments:
I'm still here! I bet your nose ring looks precious;)
I can't wait to hear all of your thoughts and I hope that you know that you can open your heart to your real friends Jessica. I have learned so much from you about being a missionary and I hope to learn more:)
Big hugs my friend!
I'm so happy you are back online! I have been thinking about you and wondering about your reverse culture shock. Take care of yourself. Hugs, Michelle
Hey! I'm still here- so at least you have one!!! :)
Wow...so much going on for you guys, and I for one, DO understand the feelings of being back in the states and the NEED for margin...and totally get why you would cry the entire time- it happens to me every single time we go back...and then every single time we restart life on the field...
I'll process what you wrote and email you, ok?
Also- a nose ring? AWESOME! :) I have always secretly wanted one, but never gotten one! :) PICTURES, please :)
I posted a comment a few days ago, but apparently it did not go through...glad to know you are well...totally understand this post and the emotions, the crying, all of that. Take time to ease into the new life. can't wait to see pics of the nose ring :) Much love, Brooke :)
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