Oh Mortal Man

This morning, during my quiet time (should I even call it that? kids are coming in and out while I am nursing a baby and it lasts for like 10 minutes due to constant distractions).... Okay, let me rephrase. This morning when I was briefly reading the word of God, trying to soak up whatever bit of wisdom, guidance or encouragement that I could get in a few short moments before I had 5 kids on top of me, I was reading in Ezekiel.

Basically it was very gloom and doom. The Israelites continued to disobey and worship false gods, etc., etc. God kept speaking (I believe to Ezekiel) and calling him "Mortal man." Of all of the things I probably could've gleaned from these verses, what struck me the most was the phrase "mortal man." I dunno...I guess as a human, although I know this life won't last forever, I almost feel immortal. Not immortal in the sense that I am so powerful and can conquer the galaxies for all eternity, but immortal in that I know "one" day I will die, but it doesn't really feel like that day will truly ever come. It seems so distant and far off and almost like it doesn't exist! Does that make sense?

I was reminded that the only thing that lasts forever is God. He is the only "immortal" being or thing that has ever existed or will ever exist.

So as I started pondering my own "mortality" (Oh, mortal man am I), I started thinking about my own life and what is important to me. So often I get grumpy or irritated or out of sorts (whatever word you want to call it) about different things. I don't like a dirty house. I like to stay on tasks. I like my kids to obey the first time, all the time. I don't like to walk into a bathroom and find poop in the toilet, etc. I often times, let my circumstances, or emotions dictate how I feel, how I treat my family, how I minister, how I live on a day-to-day basis. I think I put "stock" in things that aren't so important (maybe important to this world, but not necessarily to the almighty God), in light of eternity, because they feel important TODAY. I will NEVER get an opportunity to live this life, here on earth again. I only get one chance to do it and do it well. A chance to to it and "love" it well.

I told John that I know for certain when I am dying, I will NEVER look back at my life and say:

"I wish I would've kept my house cleaner."

"I wish I would've done that home schooling curriculum just perfect and would have not deviated from it."

"I wish I would've educated my kids better and sent them to a first class school."

"I wish I would've spoken Spanish better."

"I wish I would've ran more miles."

"I wish I would've......." I could go on and on.

The things I would regret would be:

"I wish I would've been more patient and not stuck to the curriculum."

"I wish I would've just laughed more."

"I wish I would've just hugged my kids all day, everyday instead of demanding so much from them."

"I wish I would've spent more time with my kids."

"I wish I would've loved my husband more."

"I wish I would've called my family every day."

"I wish I would've never raised my voice or shown irritation with anyone in my life."

"I wish I would've forgive more easily."

Again, I could go on and on.

I would not have one regret about stuff, activities, goals, daily duties or work. All my regrets would be about how I lived day in and day out with my family. Did I love them ENOUGH?

I put these thought into actions today by just continually remembering my own mortality and what regrets I don't want to have at the end of this life. I let the dishes sit there ALL day long. I let the floor get super, duper dirty (oh, that is so hard for me), and I certainly didn't stick to some man-made curriculm to dictate my day. But, I had great conversations with my hubby. I loved on a precious baby. I listened to a 9-year-old give an amazing presentation about Julius Cesar. I filled in the mazes that my kids made from scratch. I watched a 6 year old read a book above his ability and I put a weed in my hair just to please a 3 year old (she thought it was a flower). And I was truly filled with an indescribable peace because God kept me focused on what is important; the stuff that won't leave regrets; the stuff that will keep this "mortal man" on the right track to loving and living like the immortal God intended.